Teachers of What's Good

A long time ago, I read for the first time the following verses in Titus 2:3-5.

³ Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. ⁴ Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children, ⁵ to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.

My initial reaction as a young woman myself was of contempt. I thought, 'here goes another verse people will use to say women are just trouble, some excuse to keep us under control, right?' Is that what older women have to put up with, a preaching about drinking and talking? How original. And was my future, as a young woman, cut out for me? Was I to look forward to the task of loving husband and children, and be self-controlled, pure and the more offensive to me, busy at home? Over the years, I would from time to time stumble upon the verse, and I would still roll my eyes. 

Then I started hanging out with teenagers. It was through those friendships that I started to open my eyes and heart to those verses. I saw the pain, suffering, brokenness that the lack of role models described above brought to the lives of the kids I was hanging out with. I thought about this verse again this past month, after meeting yet another young girl who at fourteen was having to figure out life on her own.

I'm not saying fathers are off the hook here and that women are to blame for all teenagers in need, but the girls that I hang out with have been seriously affected by the lack of a healthy mother figure. Some of my friends have grown up abandoned by alcoholic or drug addict mothers. Most of my friends find it hard to live in places where slandering and backstabbing by the older women of their community is the daily bread (sometimes to the point of costing somebody their life). And some of my friends have found themselves about to be mothers in their teenage years.

In the midst of all that mess, I have met some courageous women who have decided to walk with teenage girls and love them, and become teachers of what is good. Some of these women have decided to walk alongside teen moms. Most of them are ladies who have raised children of their own and understand that you can't do it alone, that the nights are long, and that you need role models of good to teach you how to do this thing called motherhood. Others are single women who have a heart of teenage girls and can see how hard it is to be a teen and a mom as well.

My courageous friends are both in Costa Rica and in Guatemala. They go with girls to pregnancy checkups. They go check them out of the hospital when no other family member will. They have enlisted their husbands, children, siblings as drivers and babysitters. They teach their teenage friends how to help their babies breastfeed. They go to birthday parties. They also get to be there for some of life's deepest pains - a baby who dies, a custody battle that is lost. 

YoungLives mentors in Guatemala City

YoungLives mentors in Costa Rica

They also invite their friends to know Christ and start a journey of faith, that will not only impact the girls' lives but also the lives of their children. Tomorrow, there will be 27 Costa Rican girls going to a YoungLives camp, to have the best weekend of their lives, and to hear about Jesus' love for them. There will also be 28 babies and toddlers, and a fearless crew of 17 childcare workers among the team who are so excited that their friends get to have this time away and hear the Good News. So, join me in praying for this crowd.

Girls and leaders at their 2014 Christmas party. Most of them will go to camp tomorrow

Time goes by, and now I find myself a woman with husband and children, responsible for keeping a home. And now, I know... It is hard to be self-controlled. It is hard to be kind. It is hard to not indulge in things that bring comfort. It is hard to not be critical of other women. And I am ever so grateful for those teachers of good things who gave me so much over the years and who continue helping me along the way. I would be ill equipped without them. I realize how crucial it is to have someone older and wiser walk through life with you. So, if you are a young woman, I encourage you to find a mentor. If you are a more mature woman, I encourage you to find someone to mentor. If you would like to learn more about YoungLives, click here.