I've been wanting to continue writing these, but I just haven't set the time aside to do it. Truth is, it's hard to write these lessons, even though I have them already on a notebook. They remind me of mom. I sit in front of the computer, reminiscing of times long gone, and wishing she could now see the new memories I get to make in the life she equipped me to a large extent to live. But, here are (finally!) the next ten lessons. Hopefully I'll be able to deliver the next ones without too much time in between.
To keep a journal I learned the joy of writing and keeping a journal from her, and now I am lucky enough to have some of the ones she kept in her later years. Being able to write my thoughts and feelings has been one of the best ways I cope with the joys and aches of life.
To play in the rain Contrary to most parents who shield their kids from getting wet, with the fear of them getting sick, if there was a good storm, my mom would encourage us to go outside and play in the rain. Bonus points if there was hail. It still is one of my favorite things to do!
To honor your parents She definitely modeled this out in front of us. She took care of her parents, and was very attentive to their needs. She was intentional, and even in her deathbed, one of her preoccupations was how her mom would be taken care of during mom's death and funeral.
To care for others When I was growing up, I really didn't fully understand why mom would worry so much about others' problems. It almost seemed a little nosy and at times frustrating to see her so passionately involved in other people's pain. Honestly, I think I just wanted mom all to ourselves, because caring for others sometimes hurt her, too. But I learned to care.
How to Pack a House And unpack, for that matter, specially when time is short. This has come in handy as I live now in my fourth country, and well... I think 14th house. And along those lines...
How to Make a Home Anywhere We moved a lot when I was growing up, and she made sure that regardless of the place, circumstances, whether we had family close by or not, we would always feel at home. And now, as I am watching my children grow, I recognize the desire to create that homey feeling.
Doing Things Well Matters Every morning, I would be expected to make my bed - hospital corners and all. I hated making my bed - still can't count it among one of life's amazing tasks. My mom would come and check for the sheet to be neatly even on each side, tucked properly on the sides. If it wasn't done well, she would ask me to undo it, and then do it again. Needless to say, it would make me so.very.mad. But I learned that if you do something well the first time, you probably won't have to do it again.
The Importance of Greeting I watched my mother take her time to greet every single person that she met along the way. In the last fifteen years, she would work a fair distance from the parking lot to her office. At a seminary, there would always be plenty of people along the way. She taught me that everyone was worthy of being acknowledged and greeted. And yes, she would take her time to hear about how their day was going, too.
How To Win an Argument - except with her, of course. But seriously, I think she was one of the most convincing people I have ever met, and even though some of the things she convinced me of would later make me mad, or leave me thinking "how on earth did I let her talk me into this?" she did have the skills to not only convey her point of view but to make you want to take it as your own.
To Travel Alone Growing up with a working mom meant that from time to time she would have to travel by herself. I always saw her as an experienced and confident traveler, who taught me the details of packing well (forget 'how to pack like a flight attendant'; I can pack for myself and a baby in a carry on. Contact me for tips), safety, and the ability to be present and functional wherever you are, trusting that your family is taken care of.
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